Thursday, April 11, 2013

I've Pissed...

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I’ve pissed in the Chelsea in the shadow of Smith and Mapplethorpe

I’ve pissed in Grant Park in the dark Chicago night

I’ve pissed in the White House while Reagan was out for the day

I’ve pissed while LCD Soundsystem played the hits.

I’ve pissed while looking out over the entire city.

I’ve pissed while hiding beneath the front stoop, as a blonde took photos.

I’ve pissed in Grand Central, as a bum offered to help for a dollar.

I’ve pissed like a bum in Tompkins Square Park.

I’ve pissed in the proverbial tub of life during a rather low moment.

I’ve pissed in the sink, during a rather wonderful high.

I’ve pissed in the Buddhist temple where I did not find Nirvana.

I’ve pissed next to a Monet… and after gliding my fingers across the drips of a Pollock.

I’ve pissed all over the place – marking where I’ve been.

I’ve pissed a lot… and shall continue pissing for years to come…

… after all, I haven’t pissed at Graceland… yet.

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Wednesday, April 10, 2013


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Today I am thankful for...

... Spring.

... warmth.

... open windows.

... birds chirping.

Today I am thankful for...

... cups of coffee.

... good books.

... my laptop.

... my screen-porch.

Today I am thankful for...

... playing catch with my son.

... watching him pretend he is a wizard/ninja/warrior in the driveway.

... knowing that he's here.

Today I am thankful for...

... God.

... having found a Church I love.

... having found a sense of community.

... having found my way "home".

Today I am thankful for...

... hard-boiled eggs.

... PB&J sandwiches.

... having cheese to cut.

Today I am thankful for...

... the ability to start over.

... the ability to start again.

... the ability to start anew.

Today I am thankful for...

... dreams...

... possibilities...

... and blank spaces waiting to be filled.

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"I _____"

I AM - an Artist-Writer-Thinker-Human.
I WILL - create change.
I WON'T - be broken.
I DON'T - have the answers.
I THINK - therefore I could Be.
I SHOULD - therefore I won't. (Don't do it because you "should"... do it because you want to.)
I COULD - because I "know"
I WOULD - but it is easier to come up with excuses for why I "can't".
I LOOK - for the beautiful... and find it in "unexpected" places.
I HEAR - everything.
I HURT - but others can't/don't/won't see it.
I LOVE - being.
I HATE - that I have felt hatred.
I FEAR - not being able to Dream.
I HOPE TO - experience.
I CRAVE - passion.
I NEED - rejuvenation.
I FEEL - as if I've been in a vacuum-sealed pouch... but still able to see the outside.
I REGRET - allowing myself to feel that way.
I CARE - far more than you think I do.
I AM ALWAYS TRYING TO - create the mask which hides how I care/feel/hurt/etc.
I LISTEN TO - the music within... and do my best to free it.
I HIDE - under my mask-blanket... on the floor... in the dark... with only my thoughts.
I SING - my heart-song.
I WRITE - to free myself of my thoughts.
I PLAY - to live.
I MISS - the creative drive I once had.
I LEARN - in order to explore all possible paths... to re-evaluate my route... double-check my bearings... and make sure that the journey I take is the proper one for me - now.
I'LL ALWAYS - love.
I WILL BE - faithful.
I SAY - many things I shouldn't... many things I do not mean...
I DON'T THINK - just to annoy you.
I LOVE TO - gather with friends and share in a wonderful moment in time.
I WORRY - when I shouldn't. And such worrying holds me back.
I CAN'T STAND - still. Sometimes I feel like a shark that will suffocate if it stops moving.
I LOST - a sense of my Self for a while.
I DANCE - because the music moves me.
I BELIEVE - in the power of feelings (that - good or bad - we attract that which we focus on).
I KNOW - I can.
I HOPE - I will.
I FELL - for Holly the moment I saw her. And that isn't just some cheesy story-book line!
I ALWAYS - give an honest answer/thought/opinion - to those who ask it of me.
I WISH - I could leave this heap of old swords by the side of the road, and walk on... without having to worry about them cutting me all of the time.
I CRY - when I am overwhelmed by the beauty of the moment.
I HAVE - everything I truly need... within me.
I SEE - the possibilities.
I WANT - to smile knowingly and contentedly.

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