Monday, February 25, 2013

365 Project - Day 56 - "(i need help)"

February 25, 2013 - "(i need help)"

It has been a very rough couple of weeks. My meds seem to have stopped working... again. My doctor has changed dosages and added new meds - but so far nothing seems to be working. I'm in a very, VERY low place... lower than I have been in years. I cannot work... I cannot do anything - I just can't function properly. I'm not supposed to be alone... but my wife can't always be with me either. I feel like I'm having to be babysat... like I'm completely useless right now... and I just want it to stop!

One minute I'm "fine"... the next moment it's like a fuse has been lit and I suddenly want to start smashing things... tossing things in the garbage... wiping everything off the cluttered countertops in one swipe of my arm - that sort-of-thing.

On top of it all my OCD is acting up. I'm checking the stove and the door locks repeatedly - even though I haven't used the stove or opened the door.

Hopefully the new med doses will kick in soon... I can't take much more of this!

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